“When I earn money, you take care of the household chores.” Many men make such promises to their girlfriends when they’re dating.
However, numerous failed marriages and miserable relationships are laid bare before our eyes, yet some women still believe the lies men tell them.
Countless miserable marriages will tell you that if only one partner is making an effort and contributing, the relationship will inevitably break down, regardless of gender.
Marriage requires the joint effort of two people; no one can slack off.
One person’s efforts and hard work cannot create happiness for two people, and one person’s laziness can only bring joy to themselves.
Only when both partners feel happy and fulfilled in the marriage can it move forward more stably.
Otherwise, when emotions are on the brink of collapse, you’ll still be unaware of your own “princess complex” or “macho complex,” and it’ll serve you right when the relationship breaks down.
The Woman Who Treats Herself Like a Princess
A friend of mine got married, and when the groom came to pick her up, he said, “From now on, you’re responsible for being beautiful, and I’ll take care of earning money and doing household chores. I’ll do the laundry, cook, and take care of the kids. You can spend my salary as you please.”
In the lively atmosphere, such words made both families laugh, and the bride, with a flushed face, was carried by the groom to the car, surrounded by cheers.
I sat in the car, laughing and responding with a “yes,” but in my heart, I thought, “The groom’s words are just nice to hear, but who would actually believe them?”
I didn’t expect that not only the friends and family who witnessed the marriage ceremony but also the bride herself believed it.
Three years after the wedding, my friend asked me to meet up, and she told me she needed to find a job because she couldn’t make ends meet.
It turned out that after getting married, my friend stopped working and relied on her husband, just like her parents had taken care of her before marriage. She didn’t even know how to cook!
At first, her husband spoiled her, giving her 5,000 yuan every month and cooking for her every day, but as time went on, her husband started to feel overwhelmed, and her parents-in-law moved in to help with household chores.
After her parents-in-law arrived, her husband’s allowance decreased to 2,000 yuan, and the reason was that they needed to buy groceries for her parents-in-law.
My friend was used to sleeping in, watching TV, or going out with friends, so she often bought things, which led to conflicts with her parents-in-law and husband.
As time went on, the conflicts escalated, and their relationship deteriorated, even to the point of considering divorce.
She thought about divorcing, but her family said that if she divorced, she wouldn’t be able to take care of herself, no matter who she married next.
It’s true that her family was wise.
So, she asked me to help her find a job.
The Man Who Treats Himself Like a King
Just as there are women who treat themselves like princesses, there are men who treat themselves like kings, expecting their wives to “serve” them.
Such couples are not rare.
Two years ago, my neighbor’s family was always arguing, and the reason was always “You don’t do anything, just play cards and sleep all day, leaving me to take care of everything.”
My neighbor was on the verge of collapse, and I advised her several times, “Don’t take on all the responsibilities, and don’t let him take you for granted.”
However, my suggestions didn’t work, and I eventually stopped giving advice. I just listened to her complaints and vented with her.
Until recently, I discovered that her personal status and marriage had improved significantly. When we chatted, I asked her, “Did your husband change?”
She told me that last year, she had had enough and stopped doing everything, leaving him to take care of the household chores and kids. As a result, her husband was forced to take responsibility and started to help with household chores.
Mutual Support in Marriage
In today’s society, no one’s life is smooth sailing, and no one’s day is without pressure. With responsibilities come corresponding pressures.
When my husband and I first got married, our economic situation was difficult, and we had to be frugal. If my husband’s business wasn’t doing well, our life would be very difficult. However, we didn’t have much pressure or worries back then.
After we had two children, the pressure increased.
From the expenses of raising children to the high cost of living, it was a significant economic burden. When our children grew up a bit, I had to work and take care of them, while my husband helped with household chores. We were exhausted like hamsters on a wheel.
Recently, I’ve been sleeping only six hours a day, and I’m still busy planning to buy a house near a good school district.
Fortunately, my husband and I have been sharing the responsibilities and pressures of life together, whether it was during difficult times or when we had children.
What kind of couple is truly foolish? One who treats themselves like a king, and the other takes on all the responsibilities; one who treats themselves like a princess, and the other is tolerant and silent.
Such couples may seem to love each other, but in reality, one person cannot understand the other’s hardships and difficulties, and one person is busy complaining and exhausting themselves.
Only when both partners take on the responsibilities and pressures of life together can they truly understand and respect each other’s hardships and difficulties.